AFTER HOURS

Remember in old movies when the leading lady/man would drown their sorrows in a late night dive and talk to the bartender about their deepest thoughts and problems? Well, think of this page as your bar and me as your tender. I offer sex and relationship advice so feel free to ask me anything along those lines and I'll give you simple and honest advice. We all have questions that we are afraid of asking. Sometimes they are confusing, upsetting or just plain embarrassing... but don't be afraid, just ASK. So from one stranger to another... welcome to After Hours, my name is Marlene and I'm here to help.

thesexuneducated:

allaboutthejeffersons:

Rick Perry’s desperate attack on gays. I’m laughing so hard because I have no idea what else to do

des·per·ate/ˈdespərit/

Adjective:
  1. Feeling, showing, or involving a hopeless sense that a situation is so bad as to be impossible to deal with.
  2. (of an act or attempt) Tried in despair or when everything else has failed; having little hope of success.

Um. Wow. Rick Perry, just in case you didn’t know … America is largely considered a Christian nation. Every single president, including Obama, has been a Christian - openly. Christianity influences almost every single social policy this country has ever voted on. In fact, the only people who can’t pray openly aren’t christians. I’m also fairly certain that every inch of American soil is being lambasted with Christian ideology this CHRISTmas season. Santa is everywhere. So are his elves. I drive down the freeway to school to witness an enormous nativity scene in the hills to the east. I wouldn’t call this religious oppression. At all. Also, “religious heritage”? Perhaps if you actually looked at Christian heritage you wouldn’t be so proud. Or, maybe you would …and that is what makes this so devastating. This commercial and your religious-politics have nothing to do with god or spirituality but everything to do with control, domination and your own ego. smh. 

(Source: andmodern)

kaivalyam asked: Just want to get this out there and see what someone thinks. I am a politically active, feminist, spiritual womyn. My boyfriend is just as (if not more) active politically; we both are extremely passionate about our work in equal rights, environmental issues, and politics. I would say (unfortunately) I "look" like society's norm of an attractive female. However I do not shave anything. I find my partner looks at soft porn on the computer and often asks me to shave. very confused. hypocrite much?

This is actually a pretty interesting topic of conversation and a very tricky question. A huge percentage of the people in my life are just like you and it’s always refreshing to see. The harsh reality of what you are going through comes down to what people find attractive. It seems shallow, I know, but it’s just the way. If we take the politics and porn out of the question and just look at it as ‘attraction’ then it makes things a little easier. To start with, the fact that your boyfriend asked you to shave isn’t very nice. If you are happy with the way you are then he should be happy too. But the reality is that he just may not find it attractive. We can’t help what we do/don’t find attractive, but compromise and honesty is the way forward. Try and have a discussion with him about why you don’t shave and why you are completely happy with this… if he listens to your views properly he should understand. However, I do have a feeling it will come down to what he finds attractive. The sad thing is only a small percentage of us are happy to accept other people completely as they are. A lot of men are horrified if a woman doesn’t shave, which is totally ridiculous… but then some guys couldn’t care less. My brother, for instance, just doesn’t give a damn if a woman he is seeing shaves or not. I don’t think it makes your boyfriend a hypocrite though, I just think he maybe needs to see your side of things. You seem comfortable in your own skin so don’t let anyone change this… instead try and help your boyfriend understand and see that you are happy, hopefully he will listen and stop asking things of you. And if not… get back to me!

One down…

Very happy that someone has asked me a question so soon, and one that I relate to on a personal level. I understand that with sex/relationship questions most will be anonymous, but that’s not to say I can’t have any followers! So please HELP promote this tumblr… free and honest sex advice to all. 

Anonymous asked: I met up with a man for casual sex last week but just before things got heated he bailed out on me. He said he had to be somewhere but didn't say where and now he won't answer my texts and I'm paranoid that it's something I've done and I keep crying about it. I don't know why I'm typing this out on the net but I noticed you were online so I thought why not.

Well first of all thank-you for being my first question and taking the time to write to me. This is a toughie, simply because the honest truth is that you will probably never know why he bailed on you. This has happened to me before and I spent a little bit of time working out if I had done something wrong/did something he didn’t like sexually/if he fancied me etc, all the questions that I’m sure you have been asking yourself. The truth is it could be many, many things… he might of not felt any ‘spark’ between you, or might have been having his own problems at the time. If it was just a casual meet I wouldn’t think too much into it, you will cause yourself stress and it’s simply not worth it. He bailed on you and it’s shit, it really is a shitty feeling… but he hasn’t text you or offered an explanation, so does he really sound like the kinda man you want to be around anyway? Casual sex is a tricky game and you have to be pretty tough to deal with it sometimes, and someone bailing out on you can obviously make even the most confident of people paranoid and confused. My advice to you is to find a distraction and forget about this one bad encounter. If you are into casual sex then I’m sure another man will come along soon enough anyway. Don’t let this make you feel bad about yourself, just brush it off and move onto the next one! 

Feministing: Pakistan Passes Bill To Protect Women's Rights!

feminismduh:

“Last week, the National Assembly of Pakistan passed a bill which will punish those who force women into marriages or deny them inheritance. Folks who engage in these practices would face both steep fines, up to $12,00 in some cases, as well as potential jail time.

Importantly, this bill criminalizes some of the anti-woman practices that deny women financial independence and limit their social and financial mobility.”

(via fuckyeahsexeducation)